A Physical Relationship

My therapist suggested for me to focus on my writing and ignore people and everything around me; so last week, I went through my old poems. That made me to start thinking about my first boyfriend who I wrote a lot of poems about. I thought that I was in love with him. He was so darn cute; looked like Billy Ray Cyrus. Our relationship was only physical; he was very sensual. Now, I’m in a non-physical marriage and I look back and wish that my husband was more like my first boyfriend. Is that wrong? I feel that I need a more physical relationship. Yes, my husband hugs and kisses me a lot and tells me that he loves me often; but I don’t feel that he is in love with me, like a husband loves his wife. I felt that he loved me that way for the first few years of our marriage then he lost my trust when he left me at mom’s house for a weekend to meet a girl who he met online; he never got up with her, his cell phone proved that. Anyway getting back to my point, my husband never talked “pillow talk” to me and I crave that. I think that he thinks me as a kid, like my mother does; but that is for another post. If I was able to, I would have a fling. I know that is so wrong.  I know that a physical relationship never work out; but it feels so good. A real love takes care of you when you are sick, have a disease or be there for you for whatever you need. Why can’t we have both kind of relationship in the same one? Please comment on this post or email me at cp.princess70@gmail.com. Or anyone can email me about any of my posts. Take care and hope to hear from you soon.